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Monday, December 26, 2011

"I think like a guy."

I meet a lot of women who try and tell me they think like guys. Usually meaning...they tend to look at and treat sex much in the same way as they think men do....casually.  One woman even went so far as to tell me she thought it was OK to step outside your relationship if it meant only to validate or lift your spirit. I told her that line of thinking has nothing to do with how a man thinks. Whatever ego boost we need is more likely to come from someone we're involved with...otherwise...we no longer would be interested in being with you. If we step outside a relationship it's because we're just horny and want something new...not because we're looking for "validation" from another party...that sounds more like an insecure female looking to find out if she's still hot. 

So then, what does it take to actually think like man?

For starters...nearly every man's thought is consumed by a woman he likes or is involved with. Our thoughts even include women we haven't  met yet. Nearly everything we do is done with the intent of making a woman smile at us and ultimately, like us.  In other words, women are always on our minds. You want to think like a man, then start thinking about us all the time...not just when you "feel" like it. We can be completely  immersed in our work or in conversation and if a beautiful woman enters our line of sight, even our peripheral vision, we will stop and take notice.We are always available, and most certainly, willing to look. Once, I was walking and talking down the street with a female friend when a man passed us by. I noticed him check my friend out as he went by, which she completely missed out on. I asked her, "Did you just see him check you out?" And she replied, "What? Huh? Who?" I couldn't believe it. She had no idea because she was so focused on our conversation.  Maybe men are just better multi-taskers.

In addition, most men will do whatever takes it to get with a woman he likes....there is no defeating us. We will pursue pursue pursue until we break you. I just met a guy who's after a girl friend of mine and she told me that she has no interest in him and even told this guy she has no interest. And you know what he said to her? "I don't care. I'm so in love with you I'm going to wear you down and make you fall in love with me." Now while I don't agree with his seemingly blinded pursuit of her I do admire his relentless tenacity. And that's exactly how many guys think. We'll write you love poems, make mix tapes, send you flowers...anything and everything we can to earn your affections.  Do women who think they act like guys have this kind of conviction and staying power when it comes to pursuing a man?

Next time you think you think like a man try asking yourself how much time, energy and effort you're willing to put in for that man.  Until you do that, along with noticing everything about a man...and start having conversations like this...only then are you beginning to think like a man.