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Sunday, February 24, 2013

The Chase

A married female friend of mine tried to tell me tonight she believes men lose interest after they've "got" the woman because it's all about "the chase." I've heard this analysis from other women before and wonder how they ever came up with this one. I'm here to once and for all, refute this notion of men loving the chase. It's complete and total bullshit.

Sure, I understand why women would think men enjoy it. All the crazy shit we do, the attempts, the time spent to woo is usually considerable and often bordering on ridiculous. But this effort has nothing to do with the pleasure of the journey. It's all about the end result. Most men will do whatever they need to do in order to succeed. We are goal oriented. For food. For jobs. For women. Especially for women. Do not confuse our excitement from the final result with the painful steps it took to get there.

To put it another way. Two guys walk into a bar at 9pm. 

The first guy talks to as many ladies as he can over the next 4 hours. He empties his wallet buying drinks, eventually gets drunk...meets a woman at last call and is lucky enough to take her home at 2am....but not before they stop to grab something to eat, and then go back to her place for a long drawn out make out session where they may or may not end up having sex. He eventually passes out at around 5am.  

The second guy who walked into the bar at 9pm meets a girl at 9:05. They share a laugh, have one drink and by 945, they're making out hard core. The girl whispers into his ear that she wants to fuck him. He pays the tab and they leave straight back to her place. By 1030 they're naked. By midnight, he's sound asleep. Happy. Content. Satisfied.

Question. Which guy do you think any guy would prefer to be? If your answer is not the "second guy" then no wonder you have problems with men. You still have a lot to learn.

First thing to understand about men. Just about everything we do is geared toward getting women. The car we drive, the jobs we do, the clothes we wear, the smart ass comments we make. All about attracting the lady.  Plus, time is money...and blue balls. Efficiency is the name of our game. All this chasing, jumping through hoops business is exhausting. If we could get women by sitting in our underwear, watching cartoons on TV, and eating cheese, we'd never leave the house. EVER.

The only time where it may be valid to suggest we like the chase is that we do not want you to be so easy that you give off the vibe that you're easy because you're easy with everyone. We want you to be easy only because it's us.  Essentially, you're not making us chase you because of how wonderful we may be and there's no resisting our charm, beauty and affections.

If a guy does quickly lose interest in you after he's "gotten you", then sorry sister, he was never really that into you to begin with....and was probably just trying to have sex with you. It's referred to as "Hit it and quit it."

I think the chase misconception lies from the fact that women are actually the ones who enjoy being chased, so naturally, they just think we should enjoy it too. Sorry to burst your bubble on this one. Just ask Vinnie Chase. In Entourage some girl told him that he was going to have to "work for it". He laughed off her requirement and said "The reason I got famous was so I wouldn't have to work for it anymore."  Normal men only work because they have to...not because they want to. 

If anything, we tolerate the chase, just as long in the end, we get what we were chasing. If the chase was so enjoyable for men, it wouldn't matter if we ever got the girl cause the ride was the fun part....honestly, the ride sucks. Parking the car in the garage is where it's at.